Back at work

Went back to work for a full day today. Had a friend over for some gaming last night - was odd to not be drinking alcohol alongside it (almost old school like back from when I was a kid with my friends) but a welcome change nonetheless.

I thought I'd go to bed early, only to be kept up by a constant whirring of some guy on the road doing his engine. At midnight. It came in long bursts, invariably followed by a short silence during which I'd start to settle, followed by the din starting again. Needless to say, I didn't drift off until far later than planned... the best laid plans...

At work I was okay, feeling fairly energetic when I went in, but started to get a bit fatigued towards lunchtime - the same feeling as last year, I suppose. At least I know what it is now.

Unfortunately, whenever I was eating I felt a slight twinge on my jaw. Must be because of the proximity of the cut to where my jaw sinks when I open my mouth to bite. Very frustrating! At least the swelling has abated a bit now.

Also today I've been talking a little bit to someone else my age with my condition up in Newcastle who was telling me what to expect regarding treatment. It seems like a lot of unpleasant days and a few rounds of treatment. But I'll take anything to get through this, and already can't wait 'til it's over; here's something I wrote in our chat earlier that bears repeating here:

"We will beat this because of the state of mind, as well as through therapy :). And yeah, I'm not looking much up [online] because it'll make me into a nutbag and also they aren't the facts when it comes to me, so I'm waiting until my Doc tells me what's going on. It's all for the best and, as you say, my road to recovery is going to be set out for me, it just remains for me to walk, stumble, crawl and, ultimately, run along toward everything being good again."

Being at work especially exacerbates the feeling that I can't wait and can't help but wish I was healthy and able to carry out what I want to straight away! I heard people talking about going out and things and I felt so jealous! But it wasn't like malicious or anything - everyone has been really nice and the amount of support I've received has been really humbling.

Anyway, this weekend. I am taking it easy tonight because I was feeling a little fatigued after today. My friend is coming around, and my Mum is staying here with me. I'll be seeing some friends tomorrow and then my cousin is staying over. Not sure about Sunday, but I'm determined to keep busy and try to be as active as I can!